I realize that my previous blog post entitled "hey" gives you a pretty bad sense of who I am (and by pretty bad sense I mean you probably think I obsessively watch animal youtube vids and am a bit of a bully to young people at swim practice. Which is partially true, I guess). But I swear there's more to me!! In order to prove this claim, I googled weird questions to ask people. Something to know about Google: it never disappoints. I found a list of one hundred and picked the first ten on the list. This will give you a great deal of insight into parts of my life that you don't care at all about! Yay!
1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? Closed. Open. Actually I have no idea. This is one of those things that bothers a lot of people, but not me. Monsters are under the bed anyways, guys.
2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel? NO. I do not like the shampoo hotels typically have. It makes my hair feel like straw from a barn where all the animals are sad. That said, if it is a fancy hotel with fancy little Aveda shampoos, DUH I TAKE THOSE. That shit smells fresh.
3:Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out? Okay so this has actually always baffled me: I go to sleep snug as a fricken bug with my blankets pulled to my chin and my body tucked in extra tight, but when I wake up, its like the Tibble twins from Arthur have wreaked havoc on my bed. My comforter is on the ground, my sheets are a tangled braid with my legs, my pillow is across the bedroom--I should probably film myself sleeping Paranormal Activity style. So to answer the question, I have good intentions, but no.
4:Have you ever stolen a street sign before? No, but I've stolen Aveda shampoo from a hotel.
5:Do you like to use post-it notes? Only if they're neon colors and have cute little notes written on them by my boyfriend and are hidden around the house. Like I'll pull out the milk carton and a bright pink note will say "Good morning, sweetie! Have a great day :)". Okay, so I don't have a boyfriend who does this. I don't even have a boyfriend. But doesn't that sound so nice? In that scenario, I LOVE POST-IT NOTES. Otherwise I'm pretty indifferent.
6:Do you cut out coupons but then never use them? I suck at saving money, I suck at cutting coupons, I buy everything full price. I am the worst kind of broke college kid.
7:Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees? OMG NEITHER. I guess if I had to pick, it'd be the bear. It's a better story if I survive, and if I don't, I feel like it would kill me off pretty quickly. That said, I stand by the fact that I doubt I would be outside in order for this to happen. Highly unlikely, y'all. Now, if the bear were to break into my house and maul me while I'm eating cheese puffs and watching Netflix... well shit.
8:Do you have freckles? No, but I did have horrible acne for a solid four years of teenagehood. So there's that, I guess.
9:Do you always smile for pictures? It's either a smile, a serious face with a sideways peace sign, or a smize. Tyra Banks would be so proud.
10:What is your biggest pet peeve? Basic betches and airports. Kidding. Kind of. I honestly get annoyed with everything and everyone, so I don't even know where to start with my answer for this one. I'll tell you something I don't mind: Imagine Whirled Peace Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream. Shit's delicious.
Well. I still don't feel like y'all know me, but we will work on that. For now, I'm gonna go eat some ice cream and watch youtube videos. Typical, right?
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